By Euphemia Nwele
In the “business” of marriage and getting a life partner, it is what you know that separates you from rest and this is why a 50-year-old woman could possibly get married before a 20-year-old lady.
There are rules and guidelines that you should follow in a friendship or relationship – that is if you want it to end in marriage.
A piece of advise ladies: don’t let him know you read this post, but help a fellow woman today and make sure she gets to read this.
- Do not chase him: Allow him initiate the relationship; because guys love competitions and being in charge give him that taste of been the one who chased after you.
- Don’t take the lead: Allow him lead in everything, do not call him first. However, when you meet someone you like make sure to leave your number with him so he can call, but do not take his own number or start calling him, that way he still takes the lead.
- Do not show him you love him: Dear ladies, I know this would be hard but dearies, showing him how much you love him when you are not yet married is deadly. You can show you respect him but not how much you love him. Be mindful of the fact that you cannot keep a man with your love but with your virtue. Don’t go buying him gifts, cars, and so on; you would end up leaving with him for the rest of your life so then you can give and show him all the love you have in store for him.
- Do not be too available: Don’t always be there, when he calls do not always go running to him, men love busy women (believe it or not). They love the fact that you are not always with them at all times because they value their space and privacy. This leads us to the next.
- Give him privacy: Do not go through his phone, or call his secretary to ask who comes and goes into his office, do not always bug his phone with calls of ‘where are you’?
- Do not tell him what to do: You are meant to be his babe not his mom, so please avoid telling him what to do. It’s different when he asks for your advice. At that point, yes you can give it otherwise do not. Just listen to him when he tells but do not give orders.
- Do not try to Change him: Biko (an Igbo word which means please) do not try changing him, take him as he is or leave, people barely change (generally) so what makes you think he would change if you try overnight, and sincerely speaking guys hate their women trying to change them, it makes them feel insulted in a way.
- Do not be his house girl: After marriage you have forever to sex him, cook, clean, and wash for him, so for now do not mom him by giving him all these. It only makes him relax and not think of getting married to you. I mean he is already getting everything a married man gets so why rush to tie the knot?I know all these could be hard on you all because you love him and women tend to want to give their all to a guy they are emotionally attached to. However, these rules would save you the stress of dating for years and having nothing to show for it. Are you wondering why he left your 6-year-old relationship to marry a girl he just met 3 months ago? The above guidelines were broken by you. You should also read our post on the “rules of engagement” for more information about this.
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