Lockdown: Quarantining with a cheating spouse

By Euphemia Nwele

The lockdown placed in countries around the world is creating tension as well as breaking homes. It turns out that the reality discovery channel has been turned on amongst families. Spouses are finding out heart aching things about the one person they are supposed to spend forever with.

At this point, the marriage vows have been thrown out of the window and various unethical thoughts run through minds.

Few days ago on Joro’s page (a love doctor and sex therapist on Instagram) an anonymous wife discovered her husband has been cheating on her with the supposed delivery girl. Apparently, he decided to let someone else purchase food stuffs for his wife, he collects the written list from his wife and texts someone to get what’s on the list delivered to their house.

It turns out that the reality discovery channel has been turned on amongst families.

Until the wife noticed that her husband decided to order extra tubers of yam when in fact, they still had some left, she decided to watch out for the delivery girl which led to her finding out that her husband uses this as a gateway to have sexual knowledge of his girlfriend in their Boys’ quarters (BQ).

As sad as this story is, it is just one out of the numerous incidents taking place in homes this quarantine/lockdown period. Due to the lockdown, most persons are stuck with their cheating spouse till whenever this is over as such cannot vent out their anger or walk out of their home and marriage.

Cheating on your partner is a act of disrespect and violation of your marital vow to love and to hold till death do you part, it is an act that the Bible considers could be a legal base for divorce, I guess ‘for better for worse’ does not include condoning a cheating spouse.

However, women and few men of the African society tend to forgive this act of unfaithfulness and decide to give their partners a second chance at love but slightly trust.

Truth be told, once the person you love cheats on you, it leaves you questioning the basis of their love and respect for you. But still it is advisable to trade with caution in situations like this. For there could be reasons explaining their actions.

It could be: getting back at your partner for something they did, it could be payback, it could also be seduction/abuse, could be blackmail and so on.

Despite this, some people believe that cheating on your spouse can not be a mistake one makes unintentionally, backing on the belief that “a man goes to rest in the bosom that holds his heart.”

What can be done? Do partners just sit and lay in wait for the lockdown to be over before taking actions? Well, it is best to lay in wait and as you do. Take yourself through a self-realisation therapy to try and work things out, to try forgiving.

Let me in on what you think is the best solution to a cheating spouse in this quarantine and lockdown situation. Also share your experience on the “crazy cheating quarantine” story you have heard so far!

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