How to survive breakup in era of social media
By Fareedat Taofeeq
Breaking up is hard to do, as the old saying goes, but in the age of social media, it can be even harder.
When you break up with someone, it’s not just a matter of cutting ties and moving on. Your ex is likely still present in your online life, with all their old posts and photos still visible on your social media feeds. So how do you deal with the aftermath of a breakup when your ex is still a constant presence in your digital world?
First of all, it’s important to acknowledge that this is a new and challenging aspect of modern breakups. In the past, a breakup meant cutting off all communication with your ex, and if you happened to run into them in person or hear about them through mutual friends, it was a relatively rare and infrequent occurrence. But now, with social media, your ex is always there, a constant reminder of the relationship that once was.
The first step in dealing with the aftermath of a breakup in the age of social media is to take control of your online life. This means unfollowing or unfriending your ex on all social media platforms, and blocking them if necessary. It might feel harsh, but it’s the best way to protect yourself from constantly seeing updates about their life and being reminded of the past. You need space and time to heal, and that means cutting off this constant source of emotional pain.
Of course, this is easier said than done. You might find yourself tempted to check in on your ex’s social media profiles, even if you know it’s not good for your mental health. If that’s the case, try setting limits for yourself. For example, you could give yourself a specific amount of time each day to check in on your ex’s social media, and then make a conscious effort to stop once that time is up. Alternatively, you could ask a trusted friend to keep an eye on your ex’s social media for you, and let you know if there’s anything you need to be aware of.
Another important aspect of dealing with a breakup in the age of social media is managing your own online presence. You might be tempted to post about your breakup on social media, whether to vent your emotions or seek support from friends. While there’s nothing inherently wrong with this, it’s important to think carefully about what you’re sharing and how it might be perceived by others. Remember that social media is a public forum, and anything you post can be seen by anyone. If you wouldn’t want your ex or their friends to see what you’re posting, it’s probably best to keep it private or offline.
Similarly, you should be careful about how you interact with your ex on social media. If you’re still in contact with them, whether through messaging or commenting on their posts, it’s important to be respectful and considerate. Avoid starting arguments or dredging up past grievances, and try to keep your interactions civil and friendly. If you find yourself getting emotional or upset, it might be a sign that you need to take a break from social media altogether.
One final tip for dealing with a breakup in the age of social media is to seek out support from offline sources. While it’s tempting to turn to social media for comfort and companionship during a difficult time, it’s important to remember that online interactions are no substitute for real-life connections. Make an effort to spend time with friends and family in person, and seek out activities and hobbies that bring you joy and fulfilment. By focusing on building real-world connections and experiences, you can start to move on from your breakup and create a new, happier chapter in your life.
Nonetheless, breaking up in the age of social media presents new and unique challenges for young people. But by taking control of your online life, managing your online presence, and seeking support from offline sources, you can navigate this difficult time with grace and resilience.
Remember that healing takes time and that it’s okay to take a step back from social media if you need to. With patience and self-care, you can move on from your breakup and create a brighter future for yourself.